Wednesday, September 5, 2012

could you pick up some gum while you're out?

the best way to kill a groundhog is bubblicious bubble gum. preferably watermelon flavor.

I don't know where my father heard this idea or just decided to try it out, but it's true. The first time I heard of this, I was in my undergrad, home for the summer. I told my dad I was driving out to the store to pick up some things and he asked that while I was out, I pick up some Bubblicious Bubble Gum, watermelon flavor. I was surprised. Normally my father never chewed any sort of gum. If he had any sort of breath enhancer, it was a mint or mouthwash. So I asked what he wanted gum for. "Groundhogs," he replied. Again, taken aback, I asked him what he meant.
"Well, I set a piece of gum outside of the groundhog hole. The groundhog thinks it's food because it smells like fruit and so they eat it. But groundhogs can't digest it. Clogs 'em up and they die."
Horrified, I asked if he was serious and he insisted that it worked. Being from a farm town, I understood the nuissance of groundhogs and the importance of getting rid of them as effectively as possible. So I agreed. As I was leaving, my father reminded me, "Get watermelon flavor. That's their favortie. But strawberry is good too."
I never saw the result of this groundhog execution method, but according to my father, it worked.

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